30 August 2017

Dreamer’s World August 30, 2017 – My Latest Attempt To Get Back To Writing Daily

    This post marks the latest attempt to get back into the daily writing routine. All of the excuses, all of the rationalization about why I could not get this done are no longer valid. I will force myself to begin the routine over again because I am irritable with my lack of results. I need to write, I want to write, and the only way to make things better is to write.
    I suppose that today’s picture sums up how I feel. Happiness is someone who listens to you. Of course, that only works when you say something. Silence usually does not get results until it is far too late. I can post all of the stories and news articles that I want, but they won't help me with my problem until I decide to do something to fix it myself. I am guilty of letting valid reasons for not writing become a series of daily excuses, and I loathe myself for it. My soul will not find rest until I get these things off of my chest, and the best way to find release is to write. I don’t have to cover the issues that got in my way; they aren’t important except for stopping me from writing.
    Leave it to Snoopy and the Gang to make me pause and reflect on my situation. I randomly rotate the cards daily, and then I make the picture. Today, Snoopy and the Gang spoke directly to me with their simple message of Happiness. I almost felt chills when I saw the picture because it made me recognize how much I had neglected my writing. Whatever else is going on will still; be going on after I write for a little while. No life or death issue took me away from writing; it was laziness and nothing more.

    I suppose that we all need encouragement from time to time. I want to thank Snoopy and the Gang for providing it to me.


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25 August 2017

Dreamer’s World August 25, 2017 – Nearly Finished

Once again, writing is a chore. I have been so busy with constantly shifting requirements at work, and difficulties with my former doctor and these problems have kept me from having the time and energy to write in my blog. With the week at work finally over I can now try to get things organized and attempt to relax and focus on things that are important to me.
I spent time after work yesterday finalizing the break with my former doctor. Email messages from her were more than snotty about my scheduled appointment next week. She wanted to bitch that I had neglected to schedule sooner and I had to correct her since the schedule was her responsibility. I could not see her when she was not available. I went to her office after work and signed the release forms to send my medical records to another doctor recommended to me.
Hal and I enjoyed dinner out as well, and we also checked out T-Mobile because Hal wanted to see the new Samsung phone to find out about the cost. I had toyed with the idea of the iPhone 8, but when I found out that the starting price was set for $1000, it made the decision to stick with Android and Project Fi very easy.
Plans to venture out after work today rapidly fell apart because I was much more tired than I realized I would be. We did stop at the grocery store and then Burger King before returning home and I then laid on the couch and took a nap. Stevie Nicks is helping me as I write at the dining room table this evening before I take my shower and really relax for the evening.

Tomorrow I will take Hal to work and then pick him up in the afternoon. While he is at work, I will find something to occupy my time but I don't expect anything spectacular or out of the ordinary. Again I will try to have a pleasant and quiet weekend without any drama so I will feel refreshed when the time comes to return to work net Monday.

22 August 2017

Dreamer’s World August 22, 2017 – Writer’s Block

    I am suffering from Writer’s Block. It seems that nothing I write recently is worth posting, and I am not sure what to do about it. I keep starting a blog post each day, and by the time I read it back to myself, I just delete it because it is pure garbage, at least to me. I think the real danger would be to stop writing altogether, that will not help me at all. So, I will try this once again and hope that I can finally break the mental barrier that seems to frustrate me.

    I am sure that exhaustion plays a significant role in the Writer’s Block. I will try to go to bed early this evening and hope for a nice, long, restful night of sleep. I know that will do wonders for my mood and my outlook on life right now. I will have to get some things done before I can go to bed, however, such as making dinner and catching up with Hal and spending time with The Stooges. Those things cannot be ignored. They are far too important to me.

17 August 2017

Dreamer’s World August 16, 2017 – Making It Through Wednesday

    I have had an interesting day. The OneDrive problem was corrected, and I am back to my normal routine for writing, and that is a relief for me. This morning I went to the client’s office and kept my mouth shut about politics, which was difficult for me. There are too many people working there who are supporters of the NAZI in the White House. I know better than to talk about things that will cause nothing but trouble. I know that if the subject comes up, those people will start screaming to make their point. While this is hysterical as far as I am concerned, it attracts other people and causes a scene.
    I had other issues to deal with this morning as I left the apartment. On my way down the stairs, I stumbled, and I am almost certain that I hyperextended my left knee. It has been sore ever since, but there is no swelling. I hobbled to the client’s office and then back home without any further injury. I will have it checked when I go to the Chiropractor and Acupuncturist tomorrow after work just to be certain that nothing is wrong.
    When I got to the Metro station this morning, the train that I boarded had no A/C. There is nothing worse than being on a packed commuter train with no air circulation. I exited the train after two stops and waited for another train which did have A/C.
    After all that, I made it back home in time to get lunch and start working again. Thankfully, the afternoon meetings were short, and I was able to get more things done around here rather than sit and listen to people arguing.
    I don’t think that we are going anywhere after I finish work. With a sore knee and Hal wanting to stay here, there is no need to go out. I will cook dinner, and we will have a quiet evening at home for a change. Hal is resigned to not being able to drive anymore due to his vision problems. I am not sure if I would handle that as well as he has. I will be the chauffeur from now on, and that is fine with me.

    With all of the hatred and chaos in the world today, I think it is ironic that I am happy with my own life, as well as Hal and The Stooges. I vow to let nothing interfere with our happiness even as we struggle to contain the hatred and chaos of the outside world and make it a better place for everyone.

15 August 2017

Dreamer's World August 15 2017 - The Best-Laid Plans

      We all need the right tools to write our personal blogs. Often we go through phases where we are completely convinced that we have found the perfect tools to make creating the blog posts easier. It seems like every time we find that perfect tool, something inevitably goes wrong. This is the case I have just gone through with this blog.
   I use a variety of software apps to write. Often the tools I use at any given time depending on what platform I am writing from at the time. Whether I am writing from a PC, my iMac, or scribbling something down on my phone, I always try to find the set of tools that will allow me to seamlessly move from one platform to another while writing the same post. Normally, this saves time and effort and generally makes writing easier. Until it doesn't.
   Because I spend so much of my day at work on a PC, I began to use OneDrive from Microsoft to start my blog posts. It worked well for me and allowed me to send my completed posts off without a lot of extra effort. Last Friday I noticed that there was a problem syncing my OneDrive. It has gotten worse, and this morning I am completely giving up on OneDrive until I can find a solution to the problem. I have gone back to Google Docs for now and am adjusting to the little quirks that I had forgotten.
   I really like to use the Grammarly app to check my spelling and context as I write, but there is no direct plug-in for Chrome at this time. To get around this problem, I am typing the post directly into the Grammarly app, and then I will copy and paste (ugh) it to Google Docs and then publish from there. This means remembering a new set of steps that I have to take to publish a blog post,
   I am a creature of habit. The longer it takes to resolve the OneDrive issue, the more likely I will resist moving things back to OneDrive. I wish that I was a programmer/developer so I could make a system that worked seamlessly and I would never have to go through this disruption to my routine again. Until then, I will memorize this system and make the best of it.

Dreamer's World August 15 2017 - Bouncing Back

More than enough has happened around here over the last several days. The world watched in horror as NAZIS killed an innocent woman in Charlottesville, VA. I won't attempt to write more about that right now because something more important happened yesterday, at least something that affects my little corner of the world.
   Because Hal cannot drive after dark, I took him to work yesterday in the early evening. Afterward, I stopped at the grocery store and then returned home. When the time came to go and get Hal from work, I left the apartment and drove to his work location and waited for him. He finished at work on time, and I brought him home safely.
   We did make one stop at the mailbox before we got to the apartment. I had a few items, nothing important. Hal had a letter from the Commonwealth of Virginia. The letter informed him that due to the changing standards for driver's licenses he is now no longer able to drive at all. This didn't come as a total surprise to us, and it is something that we have planned for over the last several years. Hal suffers from glaucoma, and his vision is not good. Thankfully, it has stabilized and has not gotten worse, but the standards have changed for keeping a Virginia license.
   For the last three years, Hal had a restricted license that specified he could only drive during daylight hours. That is the reason I always take him to work and pick him up on Monday nights. On Saturday and Sunday, Hal has been able to drive back and forth to work on his own. Now, I will take him to and from work on the weekend and Mondays as well. Since we knew that this day would eventually arrive, we have prepared for it. We won't have to make any drastic changes to get through the situation.

   When you love someone, you do whatever it takes to get through the years together. In January Hal and I will celebrate 18 wonderful years together, and we hope for many more years to come.

11 August 2017

Dreamer’s World August 11, 2017 – Keeping A Secret

    Keeping a secret is hard to do, but worth the effort. I can keep a secret very easily, but it is something that I had to learn to do through the years. Keeping a secret means that I am trustworthy to those who share their secrets with me, and I am proud to do so. Keeping a secret also means that I have my secrets and I don’t tell them to anyone some of the time.
    For more than two months, I had a secret and kept it from everyone, including Hal. The reason was simple; I wanted to surprise Hal for his upcoming birthday. Since Hal will be working on his birthday, I made plans to have his presents and his surprise gift waiting for him yesterday. Thanks to the convenience of Amazon, getting his gifts here was not a problem. They arrived yesterday and after I finished work I gave them to him. The look on his face was reward enough, but there was one last surprise for him.
    I told Hal that I was taking him to dinner. I said we would leave at 1800 for dinner. I didn’t take him to the restaurant. Instead, I drove to the acupuncturist's office, saying that I had to settle a bill with the insurance copay. When we got there, Hal wanted to wait in the car. I finally told him that things might take a while and that he should come inside with me. I had to force him to leave the car, but he still didn’t know what was going on.
    Once we were inside the office, I told the staff that “I have him here now.” I revealed my secret. I saw Hal silently mouth a comment to me as he realized that he was going to have an acupuncture session for the very first time. The secret that I had been keeping from him for nearly two months. After nearly 18 years together, I can read Hal very well, and the expression told me that I had successfully kept my secret from him.
    Hal enjoyed the acupuncture session. Perhaps he will go back again. After we had left the office, he told me how I had fooled him by keeping the secret. He was totally surprised, and that was the point. I enjoy keeping a secret until the time is right to reveal it.

10 August 2017

Dreamer’s World August 09, 2017 – The Latest Temper Tantrum from Illegitimate NAZI in the White House

    After yesterday’s unhinged rant from the NAZI in the White House, the time has come once again to say that this idiot is completely nuts! To think that he somehow is supposed to represent this nation (in my opinion, he does NOT, and never will), is frightening.
    I saw the temper tantrum and was stunned by the body language that I saw the NAZI use. He crosses his arms like he is hugging himself. I see nothing but a spoiled brat who wants his way and will make threats to achieve what he wants. Sounds like the other brat in this situation, Kim Jung Un, doesn’t it?

    The expression is another sign that this is a very immature human or perhaps a moderately above average orangutan with delusions of grandeur.

07 August 2017

​Dreamer’s World August 07, 2017 – Noticing The Difference As Summer Goes On

I woke up this morning at 0600, my normal time for the start of a workday and noted how dark it still was outside. There is nothing alarming about this, just another sign that time is moving along despite our wishes that Summer go on forever. I find myself remembering when I was a kid and how much I enjoyed every single summer day, or so it seemed at the time. I wonder how I will feel when Autumn arrives, and Summer will be a memory once again. 
There is nothing magical about the passage of time, but our memories make it seem so. There are times when I can almost feel the sun on my skin as I remember summer days as a kid. I can vividly recall details and find myself reminded of particular days at random. I can recall hitting a baseball, diving off the high board, running through the grass, and looking around and feeling the wonder of existence when I was young. I remember thinking to myself, wondering what my life would be like when I was an adult. 
I suppose that those memories are my childhood calling out to me, reminding me that I still have a sense of wonder about the world around me, no matter how cynical I have become as I have gotten older. I am wiser nowbut not happier. Responsibilities take up most of my time, and I have to work even more to find the time to do what I want to do. The loss of innocence is the price we pay for growing up. We lose a part of ourselves and regret it. We force the child into hiding, to be replaced by the adult. The child tries to get out at times when our memories are triggered, but the sad part is that we condition ourselves to ignore these cries for help and understanding because we are supposed to be “mature.” This Monday, I wish that I was a child again, if only for a little while.  

05 August 2017

Dreamer’s World August 04, 2017 – I Feel Like Celebrating

    I have reached the end of the week. I had my doubts that this day would ever arrive. This week has been busy at work, and I am more than ready for the weekend to begin. Completing projects and then submitting self-assessments before the deadline is something that I am glad to finish.
    I will enjoy the weekend no matter what I decide to do. As my Friday at work winds down, I am already thinking about things I might do and places I might go. Hopefully, Hal will want to get out for a little while this afternoon with me.
    I realize how lucky I am every day. I just told Hal that he gets more handsome each time I see him, and that is many times per day. I think he appreciated that 😊

    The last hour of a Friday afternoon at work is always the longest of the week. Today is no exception. I want to get out of here and enjoy the beautiful weather with Hal. I want to get a good night of sleep so I can wake up refreshed tomorrow for whatever happens then. 

04 August 2017

Dreamer’s World August 03, 2017 – Feeling Better After A Good Night Of Sleep

    I slept for nearly 9 hours last night, and I feel so much better this morning as a result. I needed that rest this morning since there have been all sorts of system problems as I started work. I had to cancel my weekly meeting invite after a long time, and a new one sent out to accommodate updates to the system, and that has been a real pain in the ass. At least I made the necessary updates and got the invitations out on time this morning. I will conduct the meeting and make any necessary changes.
    Today will be the last busy day of the week. In addition to the normal workload, I have to submit my self-assessment for the last three months as part of the company process. I dislike writing my assessment because I hate writing about myself regarding what I do to get a raise. It seems like a no-win situation because if I write a terrific review, I know it will be slashed to make it more “realistic.” That is to say; the company will edit it down to justify a smaller raise. If I write a mediocre assessment; the company will be more than willing to accept it and give me a smaller raise.
    Once the workday is complete, I will go to the Chiropractor and Acupuncturist for a visit. I know I will feel better afterward. It will take away most of the stress that I have accumulated over the last few weeks. After those appointments, I will probably come home and go to bed early unless Hal has other plans and needs to go out. Since he cannot drive after sunset due to his vision, I will always be his chauffeur.
    The more I think about things, the less likely it is that I am going anywhere after work other than my appointments unless Hal wants to do something. I need to save money, and the best way to do that is to stay right here at home. I am very fortunate to be in the position I am. There is no reason to mess things up by wasting money.

    Having said that, Hal and I did end the evening at one of the local Indian restaurants with a wonderful dinner together.

03 August 2017

Dreamer’s World August 02, 2017 – A Rough Start To The Day

    Wednesday started out with a feeling of exhaustion. I got up early and made my way to the park and ride lot, so I could catch the bus to the Metro station, and then ride the train into DC to meet with the client. I was at the bus stop, and I noticed more people there than normal. Everyone seemed to be in a rush to get somewhere. The feeling was unsettling to me; I despise sensing panic and frustration from people. Combined with how tired I was, this day was off to a rotten start.
    The feeling of desperation on the bus was so thick I could cut it with a knife. Unfortunately, I didn’t have a knife available. The 15-minute ride to the Metro station was unbearable, and I was glad to exit the bus at last. I avoided the mad dash to the train platform and hoped that things would get better, but they didn’t. Everyone who had just missed the train that had just left was in even more of a panic, and that mood was so palpable it was affecting those people who had arrived from other buses or driven themselves to the station. I did my best to keep the anxiety at bay, but the tension stayed with me until I arrived at my destination.
    Once I was at the client’s office, I deliberately took time outside to wash away the crappy atmosphere that I had experienced on my trip into the city. After a few minutes, I felt well enough to venture into the office and start my visit. Once inside I found that I had to deal with some personnel issues that involved the client’s organization and had nothing to do with me. I was uncomfortably sitting in the office as the people involved were acting out their frustrations in public and found myself wishing that I had decided to stay home today. The exhaustion was still nagging at me as all of this was going on, so it was not a pleasant start to my time there.
    Eventually, management resolved the disruption, and I took care of the things that brought me there in the first place. Due to the problem I just mentioned, I didn’t meet with the people I normally meet would. I was just glad to leave there earlier than normal and head back home to resume my workday. I felt better and less exhausted as I left the office. I wonder if I had some premonition about trouble there and it affected me up to then.
    I came home and resumed my daily routine and had my lunch. Right now I am sitting through the usual round of afternoon meetings as well as preparing my teleconference presentation for tomorrow morning. I told Hal about my morning, and he thought that I might have been right about a having a premonition. I hope that the afternoon will be quiet. I am going to run a few errands after work while Hal stays home since he is having the cable company help him with installing a home phone as part of their service package. I don’t want to sit around waiting for the technician to show up here.
    The meetings are over with for the day, and I can finally start to relax. I might just stay home and take a nice long nap rather than go out. Once the cable technician has finished with the new phone hookup for Hal, we might get out, and if we do, I will feel rested. I can run errands at any time when I am not at work, so there is no rush at all this afternoon. A quick check of my bank account reveals that I am in decent shape right now, but I don’t need to spend anything extra unless it is necessary. I know that this is the right decision, and I am happy with it.
    The cable technician is here now, an hour earlier than predicted which comes as a surprise. I am slowing down as my work day draws to an end in an hour. Hal just tried to call me from his new phone. It rang on my cell phone, but I could not hear him at all. I tried calling him without success. Luckily, the cable technician was still downstairs in the parking lot, so Hal has gone down to talk to him about this problem. Hopefully, it will be solved quickly. I don’t want Hal to have a lot of trouble with his new phone right away.

    I don’t know what the problem was, only that it involved my cell phone. Once I restarted it, I was able to hear Hal when he called me from his new phone, so the perceived problem was my fault. The main thing is that he is happy and I can now proceed to wrap things up here and prepare to rest.

02 August 2017

Dreamer’s World August 01 2017 – Back To What Passes For Normal Around Here

    I am ready to start this day. I will make the best of it and do whatever is necessary to make it an excellent day for Hal and The Stooges as well. Since it is finally the first day of August, I will try to take a completely new approach to things. I wrote in the past about how July seemed just to go on and on forever, so today feels like a fresh start for me.
    I expect another quiet day at work. I hope that will be the case. Since everyone is exhausted from the push to meet their goals for the reporting period that just ended, I feel like it will be quiet. The first day of any month means I can start new things and make sure that I have resolved old items. August is the month when I select a gift for Hal’s birthday; I think that I have the gift he will like, and it will be a surprise.
    I am ready for the first meeting of the day to go over some new ideas for the future if everyone shows up for the meeting. If not, I will just make phone calls to fill them in later. Thankfully, the meeting went well, and I can take the time to think about what to do for lunch. The next round of meetings doesn’t start until 1100, so I have some time. I can make lunch without any trouble since I work from home. I enjoy making lunch without really interrupting work during the day. Cooking gives me a welcome distraction from the routine stuff.

    I only have one more meeting for the day. After that, it will be time to start shutting things down here. Hal wants to go out, so that is what we will do so he can pick up some tech item for his telephone. From what he says, he will get a home number through the cable company. Since it will be his number, I have no problem with it.