Dreamer's World May 03, 2018 - Uncertainty

    This page has been blank all day. Inspiration is not coming easily. Days like this make writing seem more like a job and less like the thing that I love. It is frustrating, to be sure, but it also forces me to find something and then focus on it to get myself going.

    Clearing my mind is easier said than done. With all of the normal events happening around me, it is hard to filter out the noise. Phone calls and emails are constantly demanding my attention. I have to keep my attention on these things because I have to pay the bills, but at the same time, I resent them for intruding on my own writing.

    As I get started, I find myself experiencing a type of out-of-body feeling because I seem to become more detached from the routine. I find myself reaching out to find that grand topic to write about. The one that is screaming for attention is my friend and his wife.

    I wrote something about this yesterday. I have not been able to reach my friend, he is not answering calls or returning texts. Not that I have constantly bombarded him with either of the two, but I know that things must be going badly and that he has enough on his mind without my adding to his burden.

    I said yesterday that I remain somewhat detached from the struggle in order to assist my friend if needed. This is the difficult time with my theory. As Tom Petty sang “The Waiting is the Hardest Part”, and that is very true in a situation like this. I want to know what is happening, but I won't interject myself into the situation.

    I feel for my friend and his wife. I hope that she isn’t in terrible pain. For all I know, she could have already passed on. I hate to think that way, but it would explain the lack of response. If that is the case, my course of action is still to wait until I hear something before acting.

    Maybe this hesitation and uncertainty is why I had such a block with writing today. Putting the words onto the screen seems to have cured the writer’s block that I felt when I started this post. Writing is therapy for me.