03 April 2016

Dreamer's World - Choices

Life is a series of choices for all of us. Some choices are easy, and others are gut-wrenchingly difficult. They all add up over time to put us in the place that we are. It is a no-win situation in the sense that not making a choice is in itself, a choice.

I am remembering a former friend who decided to walk out of my life one year ago. The reasons were complicated, but they centered on a lack of honesty and communication, as well as attempts at blatant manipulation. The friendship was doomed from the start, but we tried to make it work for as long as possible. Eventually, the facades dropped and our real faces were revealed.

The choice to end things was made unilaterally by the other person, but honestly, I was on the verge of making the same decision myself. He simply made it first. I wasn't surprised by the choice, but the attitude that went along with it really pissed me off.

My decision to attempt the friendship was a choice that turned out to be the wrong choice. I made it anyway because things were not totally clear at the time. I don't regret that choice because I learned from it, and that is the thing that we all need to remember about our choices. They all will teach us something in the long run.

There are times in our lives when we face choices that we would rather not make. Life demands that we do so anyway because life isn't fair. The trouble is that there are times like that when we are paralyzed by indecision, and that is never a good thing. While taking some time to make a decision is perfectly acceptable, we cannot allow it to become procrastination, or refusal to act.

These are the lessons that we all learn as we go through life. I suppose that in the cosmic sense that there truly are no right or wrong answers, because nothing that we do will alter the basic function of the universe in any noticeable way. We view things in a much more personal way in order to retain our sanity, and this is where we encounter the difficulty.

I have wrestled internally with choices not because I didn't know the right thing to do, but because I was afraid of how those choices would be received by other people. A little concern for our fellow man is one thing, but surrendering our choice based on the opinions of others is to stop living.

If you are reading this, stop right here. Take a look around and really see where you are and who you are at this time. That is the result of your choices. It is not good or evil, unless we choose to make it that way. Sadly, we have a tremendous capacity for blaming ourselves for everything that happens to us. This is a basic truth, but it is not final. The next choice that you make will have an impact on things in your life. Always try to make the choice that is best for you. To seriously delay that choice will only hurt you down the road.

We are the end game of our own choices, but the game never stops. If you are in a dark place, you can change that. If you are on top of the world, you can lose everything. Nothing is guaranteed.

We only live once, but the second that we surrender our choices, we accelerate the process of dying.