Dreamer’s World May 18 2017 – Ready To Throw In The Towel For This Week
There are times when we all realize that we have reached our
breaking point, and today is that day for me. All the effort of the last few
months has seemingly caught up with me all at once and I feel like the wall has
collapsed on top of me. I have already submitted my request to take tomorrow
off work and try to get some rest and recharge my internal batteries. I suppose
that my recent flirtation with the idea of trading in the Beetle was the straw
that broke the camel’s back. There was no real need to put myself through that
nonsense. The Beetle is old and relatively useless as trade bait. I really
suspected that when I started, but now it is a fact. I still enjoy not having a
car payment more than acquiring a payment for another vehicle, and not trading
isn’t damaging my ability to trade later because the Beetle is not going to
lose much more value. The pressure was self-induced. I know that it was based
on a WANT rather than a NEED. I must re-establish my own internal discipline
and stay out of those situations.
And so, after work
is over with this afternoon, I am off until Monday. I have an appointment with
the new chiropractor this evening to go over the x-rays he took and to set up a
course of treatment. I can also finally get a refill for a prescription that I
have had to wait on for nearly a month because our health care system is based
on profit and not on medicine. I will make certain that I have that done today
as well.
Once my workday is
complete, I can then prepare to take care of the personal things like the Chiropractor
and the prescription. After that I can finally try to relax and do whatever I
can to release all the stress and negative energy that is affecting me so I
will finally feel better. An early morning call to the pharmacy indicates that
my prescription can be picked up later today so I will have it for this evening
when it is needed.
During the
afternoon, I received a text from one of the car dealers that we recently
visited. The “urgent” text informed me of a “limited-time, only for me” type of
offer designed to get me back to the dealer to finalize a deal. I was rather
annoyed at the timing because I was in the middle of a conference call at the
time. I took my time and then responded to ask for more details about this
“special” deal. The first response was that they wanted to talk with me in
person later today. Another alarm bell went off in my head and I told them
truthfully that I had an appointment this evening with the chiropractor as
noted above before this section started. This resulted in a few details being
sent back to me via another series of texts.
By this time, the
conference call had ended. I took a few minutes to draft my reply so it
wouldn’t seem rushed or cause any hard feelings. I informed them that I was not
going to pursue a new vehicle for reasons already noted in my blog. I explained
that I wanted to be able to walk into a dealer the next time and have the
luxury of a substantial down-payment to lessen both the amount that I would
have to finance and to lessen the monthly payments. I also noted that the
Beetle wasn’t going to lose much more value so that was not a point that
concerned me. Thankfully, that detailed text seems to have stopped things. I
didn’t want to burn any bridges and I think I succeeded.
The whole things
got me thinking about how life does progress when we are able to look back to a
point in time and reflect. Several years ago, I wasn’t even able to get a test
drive in a used vehicle due to my credit rating. In the past, I wrote at length
about the struggle to pay things off and to maintain financial discipline.
Obviously, that has succeeded because now I am being sought after to purchase another
used car. Small steps that take some reflection to be able to see. I feel good
about the whole thing now even though I am keeping the Beetle. At least I know
that I am keeping the Beetle because I want to and not because I have no
choice. Because I refused to be pushed into a decision without careful
consideration would have been the wrong move for me, I have come out ahead.
The important thing
is that I am much better off than I was a few years ago. Sometimes it just
takes an event like today to fully realize how far I have come. Since I took
the time to think clearly about this, I feel much better about my response
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